Disclaimer: The subject of this post is human sexuality in the context of Christian belief. It is intended for mature audiences. If you are under the age of 18 you should have your parents read it and judge if it is appropriate for you to read. Parents, lighten up about this with your teens because quite frankly I am trying to undo a lot of Christian mistakes in informing and educating people about sex. You have been warned and encouraged, enter at your own risk. Also, I am by no means a sexual expert, just a guy who has been married to the same woman for 25 plus years and a pastor who has for what ever reason been exposed to a lot of sexual issues during his ministry. If you don’t find your answer here, keep searching there is probably someone out there that has it.
This is the last installment of someone asked and so I am answering it. The question was “Is there any spiritual significance to various sexual positions?” I suppose the answer could simply be: not really. I suppose also I should prove that as the conception of spiritual significance of certain sexual positions has been around for a long time. The Kama Sutra for instance attached some spirituality to sexual positions and as far as Christianity goes there is one classic example – The Missionary Position.
The Missionary Position got its name from natives who would observe missionary couple using it (different cultures have different attitudes about privacy and sex) for having sex which the natives actually found weird or humorous. The point was Christian couples used the missionary position because of the spirituality associated with it. It was a face to face position so it expressed a mutual involvement with each other. It was a man on top position which was respecting the idea was the head of the home. There was even some discussion about the fact the woman should have her legs open to indicate her openness to her husbands wishes. As it turns out it actually a pretty good position to get pregnant from and is highly stimulating to the woman if the man has the proper angle so it does have some practical advantages but for Christians for a long time this was the only acceptable position for sex.
This of course at this time in Christianity – pretty much from the Victorian Era to roughly the 1950s – meant other sexual positions were considered spiritually lesser or flawed. Women on top positions undercut the understanding of woman being submissive. Doggie style was animatistic along with pretty much any rear entry position. Standing positions were considered the positions of the prostitute so they were frowned on. There was an objection to oral and anal sexual positions because they were truly sinful, etc. In short, there was a time in Christian culture was dominated by one sexual position as acceptable and this is what set up Christian sex to face the criticism of being boring when the sexual revolution hit is the 1960s and 1970s. It is still somewhat the attitude about the missionary position that it is boring even though most couples use it and start with it.
Biblically, there really is nothing that says one sexual position is more spiritually significant than others. If there is anything talking about the spiritual significance of sex in general it is the simple concept of two becoming one flesh. It is the significance of coupling of the sexual organs that has spiritual significance Biblically. It really does not matter to the Bible how this comes about, only the action of a man’s penis being in a woman’s vagina that causes the two to become one. The position does not matter from the point of view of the Bible and so it really should not matter to us.
On a practical note, if you are going to have a spicy sex life with your spouse, different sexual positions simply become necessary. To have sex in different places and in different contexts does not always fit the same position. Certain positions are designed and some came into being because of these different contexts. Also it is having variety that can in itself spice things up. The true enemy of sex and marriage as well is boredom. It is one of the top five reasons for divorce and sex often lays a part in that boredom. The first simple act to combat this is try something new and in sex the easiest and lest expensive of these is to simply try a different position. If you want to know how many there are, that is a good question. There are books out there that boast 1000 or more. The fact is also that because you are unique as a couple there may be some positions you can get to that other couples cannot. This alone should add some fun to your sex life as you explore what positions might be unique to you.