I was currently wondering what I was doing tramping toward a graveyard with the full moon overhead. I few hours ago I was chomping at the bit to get out and do something myself. Sorry, the tedium of responding to reports and intelligence was getting to me and I wanted a little action outside of washing glasses for the pub patrons. So I strapped on my BFG and assembled a small team – Scotch, Margareta and Jade Slade from The Band. I figured between a large battle axe, a claymore, two special designed Desert Eagles and my own wonder weapon we would be pretty safe.
We had received a report that some ‘wield’ stuff was happening in one of the cemeteries. Our city has three of them, two of them on the pub side of the river. The one causing problems was on the For me this was the fact that my team was organized with Scotch out taking point. Margareta was leading the rest of us with Jade Slade behind me. I found myself staring at Margareta’s backside too much because it was exactly the same as my lovely Tequila’s.
There are differences in the three girls but in this case the difference between Margareta and Tequila’s assets were non-existent. If it had been Pina Colada that would be different as her backside is slightly larger than both of her sisters in a very good way. Margareta’s large and more shapely assets compared to her two sisters is on her chest which I can say I have seen once in all their glory including the blue violet tattoo on one of the breasts. Tequila is the happy medium all the way around. My point is I was distracted. This is why we arrived at the cemetery and I almost didn’t notice until we were right at the gate.
This place was pretty open, I t had a front brick wall about fiver foot high and a central gate but it was bordered on the other three sides with forest. Thing is this cemetery is the one currently be used the most because it had room to expand. The other two the city had long ago surrounded them and space was usually limited to the few rich families who had mausoleums in them. Out here our town would have plenty of room to bury the dead for years.
The first thing we noticed was the smell which put us all on edge. It was the smell of rotting flesh and that meant only one thing – zombies. Or the sextons here really sucked. Given the immaculate greenery my guess it was going to be zombies.
There are basically three types of zombies I have encountered in my experiences. The first if the ones raised to life by some science project gone wrong. They are actually pretty vulnerable as you could pretty much kill them by putting bullet in the brain or cutting off their heads.
The second type is raised to life by magic and these are a little harder to kill. You can cut their head clean off and they will still come after you. For these you have to destroy their mobility completely and then cast a spell to dispel the magic on them to destroy them.
The third type is the ones that empower political leaders by blindly going to the polls every election and just voting for their party with no thought as to whether that party supports what they believe. There is really no way to get rid of these zombies and they are by far the most dangerous so you would like to get rid of them but their reproductive rate is too high. Mass murder is still illegal.
I had a strong suspicion that this was the second type. Even if not what I was going to do would still handle the first type. I pulled my BFG and changed the setting on it to the one specially designed for zombies. It disintegrates them and casts the proper spell at the same time. I noticed Margareta changed out her magazines in her Eagles. Scotch and Jade drew their weapons and went in first.
I hate it when I am right in these cases but there they were standing in the middle of the cemetery. A group of shambling mounds that resembled people walking and it didn’t take them long to smell us and come at us s fast as they could. They were moving fairly fast which confirmed my suspicions. The science project gone wrong zombies have this contest between the nervous system and rigamortis so their movements are jerky and slow. Magic zombies don’t have this problem so people are almost as fast as they were when they were alive.
What happened next was actually fairly fast. Scotch and Jade’s weapons were like twin death mills for the zombies and true to my views they hacked zombies at their legs or in half to destroy their mobility. The smell of rotting flesh became overwhelming but both Margareta and me kept up a pretty good supporting fire. My shots instantly sent the zombies to wherever it is they go. The bullets from the Desert Eagles however caused small explosions that ripped the bodies apart. I don’t know how many zombies were there exactly, maybe about twenty, but we made short work of them.
To the bodies the others had hacked to pieces I quickly added my BFG to do the clean up. I also Margareta casting a spell of dispel on a zombie.
“Didn’t know you knew magic, Margareta.”
“I know enough to kill the things of Night for good.”
The last one I dealt with actually made me pause. Either Jade or Scotch had cut the young woman in half. Her legs were still thrashing and her upper half was trying to crawl away. In life she had been a good-looking woman. Blond and shapely. Her eyes were vacant now as she turned toward me. She actually smiled a coy kind of smile at me and I thought to myself she must have been a very nice girl at one time. Then I pulled the trigger.
We headed back and I was scratching my head as we found no other zombies. One thing was clear Mr. Lies was trying to get a second front on this side of the river and either we had just destroyed another attempt or we were missing something. That girl’s smile was still stuck in my head. Something more was up than we were seeing. That bothers me.
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