It has been a little bit interesting this week with the whole Halloween thing coming up. After writing my opinion post Rabyd Opinion – Christians and Halloween – Again on Friday I suddenly felt a little traffic on the blog here which was good for my spirits because it has been a while since I had heavy traffic over a two-day period like that. Yesterday was the second highest amount of hits ever in a single day on the blog, so it is cool.
The big thing I want to take into consideration about all this is one basic real spiritual struggle I have left that I was forced to reflect on because of this post. The attitude some believers take about how they acquire spiritual truth and where they stand on issues. Too many are letting their ministers, their favorite writers, their own feelings determine truth for them instead of discovering it for themselves through study of the Word. It makes me sad to see believers who talk about Halloween for instance and say: “I just feel there is something evil going on there.” It gets even sadder to me when I ask the question that if you could prove their beliefs were faulty through the Bible or reason they either are silent or they answer that it wouldn’t matter. Wouldn’t matter? Sad but true.
I will never be the kind of pastor that is popular, nor will my church grow beyond a certain point. I have had three high water marks in my ministry and it is usually in he early going when my ministry is new with people. The largest group I have ever been senior pastor of is 60 people. In my current church the high water mark has been 45 to 50. and that was three years ago. I don’t expect much higher without help from the lay leaders to make it so. If you come to my church, you will not hear me telling you what you want to hear or hear me regurgitate something I have always believed and haven’t reexamined since Bible College. I will not tell you that the clichés of American Christianity are right. Nope, I am going to make you think. I am going to make to question what you have always believed, because I believe in being a Christian skeptic because quite frankly there is a lot of BS in Christianity right now and it pays to be skeptical. We need more Christians that actually take a hard look at their faith and not just accept what they want to hear or are told.
It has been a hard lesson for me to learn. I tend to be very optimistic when I comes to people and try to see the good in what a person is doing instead of the bad. However, I feel the church has become like the Jedi order right before the fall to the Sith. Their arrogance of being the only force of truth and justice, lack of discernment and inability to adapt left them vulnerable to destruction. They became old and looked to the past and tradition to keep them safe and it ultimately failed them. The church in America has become just like them.
The world, thanks to technology, is becoming far more transparent as far as knowledge. It is getting harder to conceal that certain theologies and biblical interpretations are flawed and not based even in Biblical fact. The questions the unbelievers are asking are sophisticated and highly relevant. Yet, the church does not adapt. We hold to tradition because we think it is the same as holding on to truth and nothing could be further from the truth.
This last year I took a sabbatical of sorts (I still could use a real one) where I came up with no new ideas for the church. I simply sat back and decided to simply enjoy what God would bring to us. I won’t say it was successful from a church point of view. What it did teach me and it was a fearful lesson is that I will never be able to make a living at the ministry, at least not for much longer. I simply don’t posses the capacity on my own to build the church big enough and that is simply the truth.
Now before anybody in the church I currently pastor freaks out, I am not leaving until I am directed to leave which I see as many years yet down the road. The point of my life is simply coming to an understanding that I am going to be something else down the road and I need to prepare for it. Thus school and trying to find something I can enjoy doing that will actually allow me to retire with having my diet becoming beans and rice.
So far that which rises to the top is being an attorney. I once postulated that career once before, but a friend said I would hate it. Given that particular friend has been wrong every time about my career choices, I have decided to ignore him this time and go forward with it. Unless something that fits me better comes along, that is the path I am on. This may involve me joining the dark side for a little bit, but I plan on stealing their cookies to eat later. 😉
No rundown this week, I have already talked enough.
Blessings and Cheers!!!