I have hosted this New Year’s Ball three years running now. Despite the fact that every year we do it in a clothing optional facility it is rare for people to actually use the option. Most of the ladies want to wear their gowns and most of the men are thus compelled to show up in a full dress suit or tux. The lone exception to this current year were the Champagnes who showed up in full body paint. Mr. Champagne showed up painted in a blue tuxedo and Mrs. Champagne in a blue painted on gown. Everyone else was in their best real gowns and formal wear. For myself I dressed in my tailed black tuxedo with top hat and cane. I escorted my two wives down the stairs one on each arm. Tequila was dressed in a very formal red satin gown with white and gold trim and Connie or I should say Constance for this more formal occasion was dressed in black velvet with silver and pink accents.
Everyone applauded when we made our way down the steps into the ball room area. The ball itself was a great example of ballroom dancing. The punch was spiked with theology at my direction and so everyone was in good spirits as well as regular spirits. Even Pint was wearing a bow tie. The evening was good fun and I got a final dance in with each of my wives right before the buzzer sounded and the countdown began to “Happy New Year!” I kissed them both when the clock struck midnight. A couple of hours later the place began to empty and then I sat down and reviewed the recordings people had made during the celebration.
I had set up camera in front of one of the balloon arches and instructed everyone to give some final wishes to all the patrons of the pub in celebration of the New Year and Hitting our goal of 2000 posts. I decided to go through the clips to see what everyone had said.
First up were the Champagnes in their body paint urging everyone to get in touch with their artistic soul. “May 2016 be a year of glorious art and dance for you”
Next was Sherry and Vodka who encouraged every writer out there to make sure their muse and internal editor worked in harmony. “May you know a year of creative productivity in 2016”
Next up was Miss Wine who stood by herself she was wearing a flapper type gown from the 1920s with long string pearls and everything. She smiled and asked that people would make their relationships ones of adventure. “Take risks, baby. 2016 is going to be the year to do it.” She then emphasized her point but undoing the clasp that held up her dress and letting it fall to the floor. You guessed it, she wasn’t wearing anything underneath.
Scotch and Margareta were dressed in Scottish formal garb with Scotch in his kilt. They offered up encouragement that everyone do things with passion and honor. “Stand boldly in 2016”
Brandy and Colonel Gin were kind of odd couple. He in his full military British officer dress from the 1880s and she in a short skirted silver number that emphasized her muscled curves with lots of skin showing. “Be disciplined and enjoy its fruits in 2016”
Professor Bourbon and Pina were in yellow and they were looking smart as usual. “Make smart choices in 2016” was their message.
The two captains at sea had hooked up remotely and left the message from somewhere in the Caribbean “Be bold and plunder in 2016”
Campeche and Hilda did their message together. Hilda wore a bikini made out of a flower sack and Campeche was cloaked in red as usual. “My your New Year be filled with magic and the good earth in 2016”.
Naphtha was of course sleeping in her tree so she was not available and Avion was light years away. I missed them but such is the way of life. Some people are with us when we celebrate and others are not but you miss them just the same.
Pint had his clip too. He drank down three full bowls of beer and then howled and it suspiciously sounded like ‘Ole Lang Syne’.
Then there was me and my two girls. Constance wished everyone well and had a tearful apology to everyone she had hurt and promised to make it up by doing good the next year. Tequila hugged her and then offered up a blessing to all for prosperity and health for the New Year. Then it was my turn.
“To all of you who read this blog and like it, comment on it and read it. Blessings. May 2016 be filled with philosophy that keeps you active and awake and theology that helps you live and sleep. Thank you all for being a patrons of the pub. 2000 posts is a small milestone when I consider how much enjoyment this pursuit has given me. A toast in theology to you and yours.”
“Have a Happy New and Nude Year! Hurrah!!! 2000 Posts Celebration! Hurrah!!!”
Welcome to All Things Rabyd, your friendly neighborhood ‘clothing optional’ theology pub. I, the Rabyd Theologian and your bartender, thank you for stopping by. Please drink your theology responsibly or have a designated driver to get you home. Please tip your waitress and they might give you a kiss on the cheek. Just remember life is short so enjoy it.
Blessings and Cheers!!!